My baby is the size of a red lentil today. I want my little one to keep growing…
I don’t know why but I am having the worst anxiety about miscarriage. I fall into a hole where I am googling miscarriage statistics, molar pregnancies, blighted ovum and HCG numbers… I can’t stop. It’s becoming an obsession especially because I keep waking up in the middle of the night and can’t fall back to sleep so I Google things.
I had great HCG numbers. I had a very thick lining. I’m on progesterone suppositories. I’m having a lot of symptoms. I have never had a miscarriage (or pregnancy) before. I’m only 23… I have no reason to think I will have a miscarriage yet… It won’t leave my head.
I’m also upset because my husband’s family don’t seem excited or really even seem to care that we’re pregnant. This is both my husband and I’s first child but they don’t seem to share our excitement.
Yet my parents are through the moon so I am worried it might be upsetting my husband. I just wish people could be happy for us.
You know that saying … “treat people how you want to be treated?”
Well I am calling bullshit. I am such an enthusiastic person when someone tells me good news. I enjoy being happy for people and celebrating. I have been SO EXCITED for his sister and was always asking her how she was feeling, when’s her next ultrasound and the whole nine yards.
Her responce when we gave her a Valentine’s Day card from our baby?
“Oh wow (sarcastically) will you look at that… congrats guys…” and a one armed hug.
His mom just said “oh that’s great, congrats”
His dad said “well looks like you guys have some planning” no congrats or I’m happy for you.
Maybe I am being hormonal or sensitive but it hurt my feelings that they don’t actually seem excited or happy for us.
Anyways… We’re excited and my family is really excited. We can’t wait to see baby on the 27th and I hope they give us an ultrasound picture.
On another happy note I was naughty and bought a REALLY CUTE SHIRT. I won’t be wearing it until we announce but I am thinking I will take my bump pics in it as it grows.